Grandma brings the class act

Gulping rats in a den of filth that is the childhood of a barn owl

Beating rats in a den of iniquity that’s the childhood that shouldn’t be allowed

Baying stray dogs in the darkened streets

Better than seeing your brother running from the bobby on his beats

As your mother sways home at nights from her clubbing and her fights

Whilst your father meek and mild takes care of her child, and whispers it’s alright!

Grandma brings the class act and makes you nice and posh

As your mother sits in the corner mouthing it’s all tosh!

Your father sits there tenderly, ignore her, you will hear

As he holds you close to his chest with a love that will endear

As horses are racing on the telly and gran fills your belly

Whilst mother sits and mocks you for turning into jelly

And choking you with her smoke, whilst gran complains it’s bad – get outside in the garden!

My mother shouts its raining are you mad?

Gran says it’s bad for her health!

My mother sits there smugly and says with happy stealth

Take her with you if you are so concerned, it doesn’t bother me!

She gets in the way of my fun – my gran nods and then agrees

She took me home and kept me, for a week or two and this happened regularly

Because of you know who!

And happy I was back then, living with my gran

And when it wasn’t with her, it was with cousins or Aunties June or Jan

I got around a lot when I was very young

Made friends in all sorts of places, where I was bunged

I learned to adapt so readily, to lots of different things

So there was never a song I couldn’t ever sing

That’s how I got to where I am today

In very different places

I’ve changed in many ways

And so I keep on growing

And I keep on learning things

Because I’ve become a butterfly

And I fly on colourful wings