Triggers of grief

Grief comes in waves

A trigger of a memory

A word or two heard in passing

Thoughts of them come to you

Trespassing your mind

You can’t help it, you find

You love those memories, but they make you sad

Bittersweet, you feel bad

Guilty that you don’t want the memories, guilty you think of them

Moving on is difficult because it hurts again and again

Any little trigger will make you think of those

Who are in the heavens, those whose death caused you woes

But you know that you love them and happy memories you did share

But why does it have to hurt so much? 

When they are no longer there?

wading through the muck

We are all raised in the same planet, Earth it’s called but we all live in different worlds

I was raised in a world of violence, isolation, racism, religion and fear

I never understood why those values my mother held dear?

I learned another way, wading through the dirt

Clenching on for dear life with all the various hurts

I needed to find a better life, one that suited me

When I finally did this, from a violent life I was free

But it’s difficult chasing dreams like these

For parents hold you back

And make you think like them under siege then thwack

If you question their damning ways, they hold you down, suffocating you in waves

Of anger, of pity and fear

But if you have a peaceful dream, hold on to it dear

Life will find a way to help you, to pull you through the muck

Then someday you’ll turn around and say goodbye you fucks!